I have never felt lonelier in my whole life. I don't know how but I feel like shit. I lost the most important person in my life and I don't know if I drove him away. My best friend. I miss him since the day we wasn't working out.
I don't want him happy with anybody else, but if I'm not his than there nothing more than his own happiness.
Not sure what hard, the fact he basically move on or the lies of promise we have. My heart aches. I just wish he could come back, but how if I block him from my phone. I really don't know.
I have no one to talk to. I have a date I guess sunday, but it's not him. I don't feel guilty yet but I do wish it him instead of this new person.
I know my happiness could lie on this new person or not. All the time I'm with someone they always leave and have someone new. It hurts alot, but I know it's my fault. I guess I could be obsessive and mean if I haven't seen him for a while. Crazy shifty person I am.
I just wish that.... I do things that I know I expect him to do if the role has change.
My best friend and only. Lost two person at once. My pa. 💜
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